Adoption is Normal

It’s shortly before 6 p.m. and Ironman is bumbling around the kitchen. He’s alternately pulling on and off his mask while telling us all about life in his little language. Our beagle is spread eagle on the floor, underfoot as always. The pre-teen is sprawled in my chair watching something resembling a Star Wars cartoon. Mom is cooking dinner and I’ve just arrived downstairs from work.

Adoption is normal. Just like your family.

Amid all of the stress and the special needs and the differences, there are far more times like this than not. These are the moments when I think we are most like any other family in the world. And, that is great. Because it’s the way it should be. Adoption should be normal.

For every day of therapy, there’s probably four days of binge watching TV. For every outrageous behavior episode, there’s five times as many spontaneously hilarious moments. For every traumatizing memory, we’re making ten times more new ones. Just the other day, I asked our eldest if he remembered a particularly hard tantrum when he was younger and he was like, “nope… I did that?” Whew. A relief.

I think oftentimes we spend so much time on the hard things or the different things that we don’t look very much at the normal things. Simply, perhaps, because there is nothing to report.

You eat breakfast running out the door. We eat breakfast running out the door.

You fuss at your pre-teen for halfway doing chores. So do we!

You go out to eat or get Chinese in. Guess what (whispers) we also order pizza in as well.

Ok, you get the picture. I don’t need to drag this one out. But sometimes I wonder, considering some of the questions we adoptive parents receive. In case you were ever wondering though, adoption is completely, absolutely normal.

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